


The Black Dress Verse

by Dolimir



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Smallville, Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-19
Updated: 2011-06-19
Packaged: 2017-10-20 13:42:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 7,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/213373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dolimir/pseuds/Dolimir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Little Black Dress, as defined by Fanlore: <i>Little Black Dress refers to a character who, like a little black dress, "goes with anything." These are characters who are easily paired with almost any other character, including crossover characters from other fandom.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sacrificial Lamb

**Author's Note:**

> Stories set while Sam is at Stanford.
> 
> [FYI - My research shows that Dean Winchester was born 1-24-79. Lex was born sometime in 1980. Draco Malfoy was born 6-5-80]
> 
> This is a collection of stories and drabbles. I won't be posting them individually. Instead, I'll be posting them as one story, although they aren't really. I will be adding more to this universe whenever the mood strikes.

“You’re not quite as ferocious as I had expected.”

The simple, quietly spoken, acknowledgment made Dean Winchester spin and raise his rifle to his shoulder before he even located the source. While the sun was just about to fall behind the horizon, there was still enough light in the sky to make out his surroundings. It only took him a second to spot the pale, thin, bare-chested man tied to an ancient oak tree, and another to realize that even though the man was bald, he was probably around Dean's age.

“I’m not here to eat you.” Dean lowered his rifle and headed toward the tree.

“Pity. In any other circumstance I might not mind so much.”

Dean stopped abruptly and blinked. “Umm…”

The other man snorted with good humor. “If you’re not here to eat me, may I be so presumptuous as to assume you’re here to rescue me?”

“Yes, of course.” Dean leaned his rifle against the tree, just outside the man's reach, and pulled his knife from its casing at his waist. “Do you mind my asking how you got chosen for this ritualistic honor?”

“Kidnapping attempt gone strange.”

Dean sliced the ropes quickly, keeping an ear out for anything that might be closing in on their position. “How so?”

“My father doesn’t pay ransom demands.” The man fell forward slightly, trying to find his center of gravity after being tied up for so long, and unconsciously began to rub his arms for warmth. “My kidnappers didn’t have the stones to kill me themselves, but one of them had an uncle who was apparently in the market for a sacrificial lamb.”

Without a thought, Dean pulled off his jacket and offered it to the man. “You seem to be taking your situation rather well.”

“That’s because once I get out of here, I’m going to destroy this town.”

Dean’s eyebrows shot upward.

“Legally, of course.” The man’s smile was rather predatory, even though his movements were rather child-like as blood rushed back into his arms and hands. “They think having to deal with an angry monster once a year is stressful, they haven’t seen monstrous until they’ve dealt with the Luthor legal department.”

“Yeah, well, I think you need to get your priorities straight there, Sparky. We’re not out of the woods yet.” Dean huffed once at his unintended pun. “Literally.”

“Yes, but I find the thought of revenge rather motivating, don’t you?”

“Oddly enough, I do.” Dean picked up his rifle and nodded his head for the man to follow him. “Revenge is sort of my family’s business.”

“You have a grudge against this town as well?”

Dean shook his head. “Not the town. The monster.”

“This one specifically?”

“No, just in general.”

“I sense a story.”

“I don’t usually share it.”

The man shrugged. “Hey, I was left as a sacrifice to God knows what. Chances are I’m going to believe you no matter how preposterous it sounds. Besides I wager I can match you story for story.”

Huffing with amusement, Dean shook his head. “I doubt it.”

The man grinned at him. “Oh, it’s so on.” A twig snapped in the distance behind them. “Once we get out of here, of course.”

Dean grabbed the man by the sleeve of his jacket and guided him so that he was standing behind him.

“Since you’re putting yourself in harm’s way on my account, do you think that maybe we should exchange names? I’m not really big on Sparky.”

“I’m Dean.”

“To say that I’m pleased to meet you, Dean, would be a serious understatement, given our circumstances.”

Dean raised his rifle in the general direction the noise had emanated. “And you are?” he asked, distractedly.

“Seriously?”

Dean looked over his should momentarily, confusion clearly showing on his face. “Yeah, why?”

“I threw out the name Luthor. I’m bald.”

“Should that mean something to me?”

“I’m Lex Luthor.”

“No shit?”

“No shit.”

“Still don’t know who you are.”

“No shit?”

“No shit.”

“We’re going to be great friends, Dean. I can feel it.”

“Yeah, if we survive the night.”

“Details. Minor details.”


	2. Pay Hike

“So where can I drop you off, Sparky?”

Lex blinked, surprised by the kindness in the voice that penetrated his hazy thoughts. He tried to focus on his surroundings, but found he couldn’t determine what sort of car he was in based solely on the dash in front of him. Turning slightly, he studied the man behind the steering wheel.

Green eyes looked at him in concern. “Are you okay?”

“That really was a monster.”

Dean nodded once. “Yeah, it really was.”

“And you knew how to kill it.”

“I should.” Shrugging, Dean turned on the ignition. The car rumbled around them. “It’s the family business after all.”

“And you drive around the country--”

“Saving people, hunting things.”

“How does it pay?”

Dean chuckled. “Not as well as you might expect.”

Lex rubbed both hands over his head, trying to process the last half hour of terror and triumph.

“Do you live around here?”

Startled back to awareness, Lex dropped his hands into his lap. “No.”

“Can I drop you off at a bus station or an airport or something?”

“No. Thank you,” he added as an afterthought.

“I can’t just leave you out here in the middle of nowhere. You strike me as the type who gets in trouble fairly easily.”

Lex’s gaze returned to Dean and saw the gentle teasing in the other man’s face. “The Chinese have a saying.”

Dean waited for him to continue, but when Lex didn’t he blinked once in confusion. “Ooookkkkkay.”

Lex ignored him. “They say if a man saves the life of another that he is forever responsible for that man’s safety.”

“Oh, hell no. You’re not implying--”

“Implying nothing. I just think--”

“Well think again, Sparky.” Realization slowly dawned over Dean’s face. “You don’t want to go home.”

“He didn’t pay the ransom, Dean.” Lex swallowed hard. He knew his father wouldn’t. He never had before, so why did it sting so much this time? Was it because he knew Clark wasn’t there to save him? That this time, he really did think he was going to die?

“You can’t come with me, Lex,” Dean said apologetically. “You don’t know the first thing about hunting. It’s simply too dangerous. And didn’t you tell me you had a town to destroy? Legally, of course.”

“Do you know what will happen if I go home?”

Dean stared at him for a moment as if trying to read him, but finally shook his head.

“There won’t be any tearful reunion. He won’t even acknowledge me until I go into the office, and then he’ll pour himself a scotch and ask what took so long to get out of this particular scrape, as if getting kidnapped were somehow my fault?”

“That’s harsh, man.”

“It’s life. Or at least, it’s my life as a Luthor.”

“So, you’re what? Gonna give up a life of riches to go monster hunting with me?”

Lex grinned predatorily. “You’re looking at this all wrong, Dean.”

“Oh, and how should I be looking at it?”

“That hunting just started paying a lot more than it used to.”


	3. Lunch Negotiations

Dean took a large bite out of his hamburger and watched his companion frown at his salad. For a moment it reminded him so much of Sammy that he thought his heart had bruised his sternum. He gripped his sandwich tighter in an effort to prevent himself from rubbing his chest and slowly release his breath through his nose as he continued to chew.

Lex Luthor wasn’t Sammy.

While Sam could blend into almost any situation, Lex stuck out like a sore thumb. Even though he was dressed exactly like Dean, Lex’s physical carriage screamed that he was slumming, that he had more important matters to attend to besides eating lunch at a no-name diner off I-35. People would definitely remember him, even if they didn’t immediately recognize him as the only son of a publicity seeking billionaire.

No, this wasn’t going to work.

“Stop thinking so loud.”

Dean huffed once in amusement. Once he finished chewing, he deliberately set his hamburger on his plate, rested his elbows on the table and intertwined his fingers together. “This isn’t going to work.”

Lex opened his mouth to protest, but Dean interrupted him by shaking his head. “Face it, Lex, you couldn’t blend in if your life depended on it. And in this job your life could very well depend on it. A lot of what we hunt is sentient. Evil, but intelligent. If you stand out, there’s a good chance you’ll be ambushed before you even know what you’re hunting, and being remembered is a sure-fire way to spend some serious time in a very small cell on the government’s dime.”

“I can blend in.”

“I seriously doubt that.”

But even as he spoke he watched Lex’s posture relax, the hard edges of his face softened, making him look years younger and infinitely more innocent.

“Impressive, but can you do it all the time, without thinking?”

“Yes.”

Dean popped a fry into his mouth. “I don’t understand why you’d want to put yourself in harm’s way?”

Lex frowned at his salad again, then reached over the table and snagged one of Dean’s fries. “Being tied to that tree gave me a lot of time to think. I’ve never been happy with the direction my life has taken. No matter how many times I’ve tried to forge my own path, I always end up being my father’s puppet, probably because I’ve always tried to compete in an arena where he was already king. But for the first time, I can see a future where I can not only be my own man, but be proud of what I do.”

“There have to be easier ways to rediscover yourself, safer than declaring yourself chum for the supernatural baddie of the week.”

“Perhaps, but so far all attempts to get from under my father’s thumb have failed miserably.”

“Well hunting monsters will definitely get you off everyone’s grid.” Dean untwined his fingers and pinched the base of his nose. “Do you even know how to fire a gun?”

“Yes. I’m rather proficient at handguns, rifles and semi-automatic weapons.”

Dean raised an eyebrow in surprise.

“My education has been rather eclectic.”

“Apparently. I just don’t--”

“I figured I should probably start out in a support role while I learn the ropes.”

“Support?”

“Well, not to brag, but I’m really good at research. While I obviously have no experience with killing monsters, it strikes me that a job like this would require a lot of investigation.”

“Research? You want to do research?”

Lex cocked an eyebrow at him like he wasn’t quite sure he understood the question. “Yes. I’ve always enjoyed learning about--”

Grinning ear to ear, Dean held his hand toward Lex. “You’re hired. Welcome to the team.”


	4. Reflection

Lex had always believed himself to be in good shape. Growing up, he had fenced, boxed and practiced several types of martial arts. Yet, he still found himself woefully unprepared for the physical challenges of hunting. But what surprised him was that while Dean expected quite a bit from him, it was never more than Lex could give or endure. Dean never tried to humiliate him, nor did he try to boost Lex’s ego with false praise. When he failed, Dean would explain why what he did was wrong then how to correct the problem. If he did well, Dean might say _good job,_ but more often than not he’d simply grasped Lex’s shoulder and give him a proud grin.

When it came to formal investigation, Dean gave him an incredibly thorough overview of the sources he used and places where information on the supernatural could be found. Dean had also put two men in Lex’s speed dial: Robert Singer and Pastor Jim Murphy. After making an introductory phone call to each man, letting them know that Lex was now on his team, he stepped back and let Lex take over the research aspect of their operation.

But what surprised Lex was that Dean never asked him to contribute to the kitty. While Clark always claimed that he wanted nothing from Lex for himself, he did on several occasions ask for things for his friends. Not that Lex had ever minded. But Dean never asked.

Dean always got a single room with double queens, saying there wasn’t much point in wasting money on separate rooms. At first Lex was suspicious that Dean was trying to seduce him, not that he was opposed to the idea, but he quickly came to realize that Dean essentially liked to have Lex tucked under his metaphorical wing. Dean also paid for their meals, their weapons, supplies and gas.

It finally dawned on Lex that Dean probably thought he was broke. While it was true he no longer had any desire to tap into the unlimited resources of the Luthor empire, he had managed to squirrel away quite a bit of money over the years, money he knew couldn’t be traced by his father. So slowly, but surely, he started paying for things. Not all the time, and never in a flashy or showy manner, for he sensed that would be a mistake, but as often as he thought he could without stepping on Dean’s toes.

He’d been on the road for two weeks when he realized that for the first time in his life he felt safe. The idea that he was safe while hunting monsters was a preposterous one, but Lex actually felt something within himself unwind as the days passed. No more looking over his shoulder, wondering who was plotting against him or trying to use him against his father. No more wondering what mutant of the week was going to storm the mansion and declare hunting season on the Luthor heir. No more wondering what new way his father would find to humiliate him.

Dean slid into the restaurant booth, grunting gratefully for the waiting mug of coffee. “So what do we have?”

Lex opened the top of his satchel and pulled out his laptop. “A possible black dog in Colorado, what looks like a pixie infestation in Maryland and Bobby called with a poltergeist in Iowa.”

“We should probably take care of Bobby’s thing first, but I’d rather take care of the black dog after that and see if we can pass the buck on the pixies.” When Lex raised a questioning eyebrow, Dean grimaced. “Sadistic little fuckers.”

Lex sensed a story there but knew enough to let it go…for the moment…or at least until Dean had more coffee in his system.

“So what’s with the purse?”

Lex’s eyes widened as he followed Dean’s gaze to his messenger bag.

When Lex had first started riding along with Dean, he kept expecting the same hurtful sense of humor that had often been hurled at him by his previous associates, but what he got instead was part twelve-year-old boy, part high-brow and part bawdy humor. He also quickly learned that Dean could take it as well as dish it out.

“Hey, you were the one who said that a brief case was out of the question.”

“No self-respecting hunter would carry a briefcase, unless he was pulling off a con.”

“I could be a trend setter.” Dean opened his mouth to respond, but Lex cut him off. “I’m sensing Rachmaninoff in your very near future.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

Lex gave him his best shark grin. “Try me.”

No, life on the road wasn’t anywhere near what he was expecting.

It was better.


	5. Dirty Little Secret

“Dean, for God’s sake. Would you please lay back down?”

“Can’t. Dad sent us coordinates.” Dean’s upper body wobbled at a forty-five degree angle for a moment then slumped gracelessly back onto the bed. It was the soft moan more than anything that told Lex how bad his companion was feeling.

A small snide part of Lex wanted to point out that John Winchester had sent his son coordinates, not them.

Even though they’d been hunting together for nearly a month, Lex knew Dean still hadn’t told his father about gaining a hunting partner. Not that Lex really blamed him. He had enough daddy issues of his own without trying to force Dean to confront his. And wasn’t it a tad ironic that he was feeling a bit like a dirty secret?

Dean made another effort to sit up, but didn’t make it nearly as far as he had the first time. Considering the distance the black dog had dragged him through the forest before he’d managed to kill it, Lex was impressed that Dean could even move at all.

Even though he hadn’t known Dean very long, Lex had no doubt that Dean was merely shoring up his energy for another attempt. If, somehow, Dean managed to make it to his feet, there’d be no stopping him.

Grabbing his backpack, he set it beside Dean’s bed, then sat on the mattress and firmly placed his left hand on Dean’s chest.

“Okay, tough guy, say we did get on the road within the next ten minute, how long would it take us to reach Darby, Montana?”

Dean shut his eyes for a moment. “I don’t know. Ten hours, maybe, if we drive straight through without stopping and stomped on the gas a little in the boonies.”

“And what time would that put us there?”

“Around ten p.m. Why?”

“Ten. Let’s say Darby is big enough to have their own library, do you honestly think there’s a chance in hell it’ll be open at ten o'clock at night? I bet they roll up the sidewalks by eight. I doubt we’ll even be able to find anyone to question before dawn.”

Dean frowned up at him. “What’s your point?”

“Get some rest.” Dean opened his mouth to protest, but Lex shook his head and pressed his hand ever-so-gently against Dean’s chest. “In the meantime I’ll see if I can get a leg up on our research. If we’re lucky, maybe I can figure out what we’re going to be walking into before we arrive.” Again Dean opened his mouth, but Lex steamrolled over him. “If we leave before dawn, we’ll definitely get there between early to mid-afternoon. Plenty of time to get our feet wet.”

Lex watched a wave of yearning pass over his friend’s face and knew that Dean really wanted to take him up on his suggestion, but ignoring his father’s implied order was warring heavily with his conscience.

“I’m prepared to sweeten the deal.”

Dean gave him a wary look.

Bending, he retrieved an item from his backpack. Dean tried to be nonchalant in his curiosity, but his eyes widened in delight when he spotted the roll of quarters in Lex’s hand.

“Deal.”

Lex smirked as he put a coin in the Magic Fingers™ box.

Dean hummed in contentment. “I’m not normally such a cheap date.”

“Yes you are.”

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled, “you’re right. I am.”

When Dean’s eyes started to droop, Lex leaned forward a bit, preparing to stand. “I’ll just get started on the research,” he whispered.

But before he could get to his feet, Dean’s hand shot out and grabbed his wrist. “Okay, but leave the quarters.”


	6. The Morning After

“Okay, that’s it. I’m cutting you off.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I’m starting to feel vaguely dirty and that’s saying something coming from a Luthor.”

“But you’re the one who--”

“I know, but since I was the one to start it, I’m going to be the one responsible for putting a stop to it as well.”

“Oh, come on!”

“Whining won’t work, you know. I’m impervious.”

“You wouldn’t have been if you'd met Sammy when he was five. That kid had a killer combo of whining and puppy dog eyes. Not even dad couldn’t withstand him.”

“How’d he outgrow it? That is, I assume he did.”

“Heh. Depends on the time of the month.”

“But how--”

“Peer pressure. Apparently his fellow kindergarteners were made of pretty stern stuff.”

“Well, consider this your peer intervention.”

“How about just one more?”

“No. That’s what you said last time.”

“Aw. Come on, Alex. Be a sport. Gimme a quarter. I promise I’ll do laundry for a week.”

“Hell, no. I’ve witnessed you doing laundry. I’m not making the mistake of giving you my clothes again.”

“You big girl.”

“Not scoring any brownie points here, pal.”

“C’mon. One for the road?”

“No.”

“Meanie.”


	7. An Ordinary Life

Dean shook his head with affectionate exasperation as he watched his friend through the gas station’s plate glass windows. Alex was giving the matronly attendant a smile that would melt butter. And while she hadn’t initially been taken in by Alex’s charm, Dean could see the corners of her mouth start to move upward as the minutes ticked by.

The gas pump snapped loudly to a stop. Dean topped off the tank, then gave Alex a wave as he pulled the nozzle from the back of the Impala. Alex acknowledged his gesture, but made no attempt to curtail his social wooing.

Once the nozzle was back in its cradle, he bent to secure the lid over the gas tank. When he straightened, Alex was walking toward him, a plastic sack swinging from his forearm and two huge Styrofoam cups of hot coffee.

“It’s fresh.” Alex passed one of the cups to Dean.

“How did you manage that?” Dean sniffed the coffee deeply before taking a sip. Smiling, he raised the cup and smiled at the attendant, who blushed and turned, but not before Dean saw her smile.

“Anything worth doing is worth taking a few extra minutes to do it right.”

“If the doughnuts are as fresh, I’ll let you drive.”

Alex laughed. “No doughnuts, young padawan. Breakfast burritos.”

“But the sign said--”

“But how does that compare to eggs, sausage and cheese freshly nuked?”

“You’re not seriously trying to tell me that breakfast burritos are healthier than doughnuts?”

“No, but they do contain more trace amounts of protein.”

Dean sighed as he slid in behind the steering wheel. “Alright, but I’m driving.”

“Works for me.” Alex joined him in the car and immediately dug a burrito out of his bag and handed it to Dean, then with a roll of his eyes, he reached in and pulled a doughnut partially out of the bag.

“Aw, you do love me.”

“Better than listening to you whine for the next hundred miles.”

“I don’t whine.”

“And you don’t get this cream-filled beauty until you eat the burrito.”

“Yes, mama.”

After breakfast was consumed, Dean took a moment and studied his companion, who was gathering the trash. Alex had been as good as his word when it came to blending in with those around him. With his wearing a knitted cap, no one would be able to guess that he was the son of one of the wealthiest people on the planet.

“You’re thinking too loud again.”

Dean snorted. “Why do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Take the time to brighten the day of a woman who's old enough to be your mother?”

Alex turned in his seat, his back against the passenger side door as he faced Dean. “Most of my life, I never even saw people like her. My father would call them little people, as if they had no importance in the grand scheme of things. But each one of them has a story. Each one of them has dreams. I just enjoy listening to them.”

“Seeing how the ordinary people live?”

“That’s part of it, I suppose.”

Dean looked back at the road. “Does it make you miss your old life?”

Alex waited until Dean looked back over at him. “No. Not in the least.”


	8. Not Again

“Vampires.”

“I know.”

“You told me they were extinct.”

“I thought they were.”

“I specifically asked you if vampires were real and you told me no, that they had gone the way of the Dodo.”

“What do you want from me? Dad told me they had been hunted out of existence decades ago.”

“All it takes is one to survive to propagate the species.”

“I’m thinking one did.” Dean looked around the barn at the dozen or so vampires grinning at him and Alex. “Sorry.”

“For what?”

“For getting you killed.”

“What? You don’t think there’s a chance they’ll just turn us?”

“Turn a hunter?” The largest vampire sneered at them. “I think not.”

“I take it crosses and garlic don’t work on them?”

“Doubtful.”

“Any helpful suggestions?”

“Aim for the neck.”

En masse the vampires took a step forward. Alex felt the wood of the barn’s wall at his back. He blinked in surprise as Dean interposed his body between him and the vampires.

“Oh, hell no.”

“Shut up, Alex, and let me do my job.”

A moment later a blond man holding a small stick appeared in the middle of the barn, screaming in anger, his voice sounding as if were being torn from his body. “What the bloody hell do you want from me? I’ve paid my penance. I’ve been pardoned! Why can’t you leave me alone?”

The vampires stopped at the man’s sudden appearance, but instead of being surprised they grinned malevolently.

The large vampire laughed. “Looks like we won’t have to be skimping on dinner tonight, children!”

The vampires chuckled, as one-by-one they let their fangs drop.

The man’s shoulders hunched forward as if he were in a great deal of pain. “I’ve had it with you arseholes.”

“And what are you going to do, human? Hit us with your widdle stick?”

“The London Accord of 1283 doesn’t accord vampires protected species status under the Unforgivable Act,” the blond said calmly, even as he straightened his posture.

“Wouldn’t matter if it did. You aren’t in Kansas anymore, human.”

The large vampire leapt forward.

“Avada kedavra!”

A jet of green light blasted from the stick and surrounded the vampire, who dropped mid-step. The remaining vampires stood stunned.

“Anyone else want a piece of me?”

The vampires raced forward, but the blond held his ground. The air was filled a rushing noise and shouts of _‘stupefy’_ and _‘avada kedavra’_ punctuated the air. Multi-colored flashes of light encompassed each vampire until all were lying on the hay covered ground.

“Holy crap!” Dean whispered under his breath.

The blond turned, panting hard, and pointed his stick at the center of Dean’s chest.

Dean raised his left hand in a surrender gesture. “Whoa. Hold it, Merlin. We mean you no harm.”

“Shite! Muggles.” With that, the blond’s eyes rolled back in his head and he collapsed.

“Umm,” Lex said.

“Yeah,” Dean responded.

Lex moved to Dean’s side as they both looked down at the unconscious man. “So what’s the plan?”

Dean shook himself out of his reverie. “We’re going to take things one step at a time. You get blondie to the car. I’m going to behead these guys to make sure they really are extinct this time and then we’re going to burn down the barn.”

“And then?”

“Hell, I don’t have a clue.”

“We could keep him.”

“What?”

“He seems pretty good in a fight. After all, he just saved our asses.”

“You can’t keep him, Alex.”

Lex grinned at him. “Sure I can. You kept me.”


	9. Decisions

“Alex, I’m serious. We can’t keep him.” Dean finished putting the remaining bandages in the med kit before turning to give his friend a pointed look.

“What?” Lex raised his hands in surrender. “I didn’t say a word.”

But Dean wasn’t buying the innocent act. “Only because you’re trying to figure out how to couch keeping him in terms that'll make it seem like it was my idea.”

He ignored Alex’s surprised gaze.

Just because Dean Winchester only had a GED didn’t mean he couldn’t recognize when someone was trying to pull the wool over his eyes. While Dean’s father ran a fairly tight ship, Dean didn’t feel the need to impose his father’s rules on his friend outside of the hunt, so he let Alex have his way a lot of times. It made life easier and it gave Dean a little extra leverage about things that did matter to him. Mostly though, he just enjoyed sitting back and watching the way Alex’s brain worked, which was vastly more entertaining than most of the crap on television.

Nonchalantly, Lex picked the wizard’s wand off the dresser and ran his fingers lightly up and down the shaft, occasionally flicking it as if expecting something to happen. He chose not to look at Dean when he spoke. “All evidence points to the fact that he may be a genuine wizard and not some psycho intent on blood magic.”

Dean nodded once as he watched Alex continue his examination. “Perhaps, but he seems a tad too dependent on his little stick.”

Lex raised his head and smirked at him. “You mean his wand?”

Dean waved his hand dismissively then flopped onto the threadbare chair beside the window. “What happens if he loses it or someone takes it away from him?”

Lex sat on the free bed and studied his friend for a moment. “Is your reluctance because he killed six vampires all by himself?”

Dean shrugged.

“Doesn’t that mean he’d be good in a fight?”

“And if he comes across something impervious to magic?”

“Impervious. Heh. My vocabulary is finally rubbing off on you.”

Dean rolled his eyes and flipped Alex the bird. “The point is… he’d be vulnerable, with no idea how to take care of himself.”

“So we’ll teach him, like you taught me.”

“Alex--”

“And what about the way he teleported into the barn?”

“I’m pretty sure he didn’t mean to land there.”

Lex shrugged. “Maybe not. But you have to admit that being able to teleport places would be a handy skill to have in our line of work.”

“And if he gets knocked out or killed? Then we’d be stuck in the middle of nowhere with no way to get home.”

Leaning forward, with his elbows on his knees, Lex studied his companion. “Are you worried that he’s evil?”

Dean shook his head, though his gaze strayed toward the unconscious man on the bed. “No. Something happened, something catastrophic, and somehow he ended up on the wrong side of things. But I don’t believe he’s evil.”

“How do you figure that?”

“Because when he teleported in, he said, _‘I’ve paid my penance. I’ve been pardoned! Why can’t you leave me alone?’”_

“He was being harassed?”

“That’d be my guess, which might also explain how he ended up in a barn in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere.”

“What--”

“If he can work magic, it makes sense that those harassing him possess magical abilities as well. My guess is they threw something at him just as he was trying to get away.”

“So you’re worried someone might come looking for him?”

Dean shook his head. “No. I think he’s a long way from home and that no one from his world knows where he is.”

“You heard the accent too?”

“Yeah.”

“So then what exactly is your objection?”

Dean frowned at his friend. “Keeping in mind that he will, in all likelihood, disappear the moment he has his wand back, my objection is not only what he called us before he passed out, but how he said it.”

“He called us muggles.”

“That’s right.”

“So?”

Dean leaned back in his chair and rubbed both hands over his face, their vampire adventure finally catching up with him. “It had a connotation of being politically incorrect.”

For a moment, against his better judgment, Lex grinned at his friend. Outside of the roles they played to gather information about their cases, Dean liked to give the impression of being an uneducated, blue-collar working man. However, Lex knew Dean could be quite articulate, although he always acted as if he’d rather have his teeth pulled than admit to it.

When Dean frowned at him, Lex hastily swallowed his smile. “So?”

“So the way he said it is how I imagine your father says poor people.”

“Hmm.”

“Hmm?”

“That’s actually a really good point.”

“Don’t sound so surprised, Sparky.”

Lex was torn between chuckling over Dean’s indignation and annoyance over the use of the hated nickname. “So you think…what?”

“I think,” and Dean said _think_ rather pointedly, “that our wizard here believes himself to be better than us. That even hitting his rock bottom is better than hanging out with two muggles.”

“So you think he’s going to act as if he’s better than we are?”

Dean sighed in annoyance. “Alex, would you let your scientific brain forget for a moment that he can perform magic?”

“What?”

“You’re letting his abilities color your judgment because you want time to study him.”

Lex had grace enough to blush.

“Give me one good reason why you think he’d want to stay with us? Muggles, who hunt monsters for a living.”

“Because I have nowhere else to go,” came the quiet response.

Both Dean and Lex blinked in surprise as the blond haired man struggled to put his back against the wall at the top of the bed.

“Hello. My name is Draco Malfoy and I would love to learn how to hunt monsters with you.”


	10. Life's Funny That Way

His family had almost seen the light too late. Deciding not to tempt fate, his parents had emptied their Gringott’s accounts and fled to Switzerland. But England was all Draco knew and he didn’t want to hide – a decision that cost him greatly, both emotionally and physically.

While pardoned by the Wizengamot, the general public wasn’t quite so forgiving. Attacks came from every shadow, from around every corner. Nowhere was safe and he soon realized he could count no one as a friend.

Although how he ended up in the Colonies with two muggles as his companions still perplexed him.


	11. The Book Club

When Drake decided he needed to expand his horizons by reading muggle literature during their down times, Alex prepared a list for him and hit every rural used bookstore he could find.

Drake’s questions often lead to some fairly rousing discussions between him and Alex. After a while, Dean reluctantly started snagging the books after Drake was done with them so he could keep up with the banter and debates. Who knew intellectuals would quote literature like most guys would reference bad movie quotes?

However, he would salt and burn anyone who dared refer to them as a book club.


	12. Phone Etiquette

“It stopped ringing.”

Bobby held the receiver away from his ear and shook his head. “That’s because I picked up, you idjit.”

“What does idjit mean?” Draco asked someone on his end.

“It means he likes you.”

Bobby heard Dean’s response in the distance and snorted in spite of himself. “And what can I do for you, young Master Malfoy?” Bobby asked with his best English accent.

“Oh, nothing really. Dean said he wants me to practice using Muggle devices so I don’t forget how to use them in an emergency.”

“Makes sense. So where are you boys?”

“In a restaurant.”

Bobby pinched the bridge of his nose. “It what state?”

“Wait. Don’t tell me. I know this. We’re in Idaho.”

“Ohio,” Alex supplied in the background.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Have we been to Idaho yet?”

“No, but you like their potatoes.”

“I”—

“Where are you boys headed?” Bobby asked, hoping to stop the Laurel and Hardy routine before it started.

“Nebraska?”

“You asking or telling, boy?”

“Er. Telling?”

“Do me a favor?”

“Of course.”

“Call Pastor Jim and asked him if he has any Prince Albert in a can.”

“Okay? Um. Why?”

“Because I owe him one.”


	13. Enough

They'd been arguing for almost an hour when a loud whistle brought their discourse to a sudden halt. Both Lex and Draco turned to stare incredulously at Dean.

“Dinner is served.”

Draco frowned. “What?”

Instead of answering, Dean tossed the pizza box onto the middle of the table, ignoring the squawks from both men as they scrambled to save their notes. He then flipped the lid open, grabbed a slice of pizza and left the room, leaving the door open in his wake.

“What was that all about?”

Lex smiled ruefully. “That was Dean telling us enough is enough.”


	14. Reflection, Part Deux

Alexander Luthor casually leaned against the side of the abandon barn’s loft door and watched the sun slowly descended toward the horizon. There was a time in his not so distant past, when he used to share this activity with a friend and they would speculate about their futures while they waited for the stars to appear; but Clark’s obfuscation and his own obsession with knowledge had strangled the friendship before it really ever had a chance to take root. Lex could admit there was a part of him that still missed Clark, but he wondered if he missed the boy or the fact that he never learned his secret.

Lionel, Lex’s father, was all about intrigue. He used to lecture Lex about how knowledge was power and then use every means possible to prevent Lex from learning anything useful, while at the same time berating Lex for not being strong enough to be his own man.

He wonders sometimes if that’s what used to drive him to try to discover Clark’s secrets. Despite all Clark’s misdirection, it was obvious to anyone with two brain cells to rub together that Clark was trying to hide the fact he had abilities beyond that of a normal human. Of course, in Smallville, that wasn’t saying a lot. So why did Clark always lie about his abilities?

Lex had tried to distance himself from Clark, but found himself either being pulled back by Clark or returning to Clark on his own. His obsession to best his father or to learn Clark’s secrets had almost driven him mad.

But then he had been kidnapped.

Never, in a million years, would he have believed that being kidnapped could have saved his soul.

But it had.

A kidnapping gone strange was how he explained it to Dean Winchester, the man who had saved him from becoming the sacrificial meal for a supernatural creature.

Dean had recognized a kindred spirit searching for some semblance of meaning in his life and had rescued Lex on levels Lex hadn’t even dreamed possible. Instead of hiding what he did for a living, he taught Lex all he knew. He opened Lex’s eyes to what true evil was, but instead of abandoning him to the darkness, he taught Lex that there was always a way for light to prevail -- all that was needed was the right knowledge and a whole lot of blood, sweat and tears.

Lex turned for a moment and watched Draco on the main floor of the barn as the young wizard transfigured each stall into a comfortable bed with several flicks of his wand.

Lex had briefly worried that Draco’s presence would upset the precious peace he had fought so hard to achieve, but instead of being secretive or lying about his abilities, Draco, like Dean, had been more than happy to discuss his magical abilities. And while Lex simply didn’t have the correct DNA to perform magic the way Draco could, they quickly discovered that he was pretty adept at making potions and at figuring out new ways for Draco to use his abilities.

Dean had once asked Lex if he missed his old life: having people waiting on him night and day, being able to buy whatever he wanted whenever he wanted and Lex had been surprised when Draco answered with him when he said no.

Clark Kent could keep his secrets and his father could keep his world of sycophants and lackeys, Lex was ecstatically happy to be nothing more than Alex, a lost boy, who had given up a world of wealth to discover what it really meant to be rich in life.


	15. Airtight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written in present tense. I don't know why.

“So what’s the lore for women in red?”

Pulling his beer away from his lips, Dean looks at Lex in surprise, only to discover that his companion’s attention is focused on a gorgeous woman standing by the bar.

“I’ve never heard of a woman in red,” he finally admits. “Why?”

Lex finally turns his attention to Dean and grins mischievously. “I’m trying to determine whether she’s real or not?”

Dean shakes his head, amused. “Feeling a little frisky, are we?”

Draco snorts at the double entendre, then rubs his nose to ease the carbonation burn in his nasal cavity.

Lex shakes his head, taking a sip of his own beer. “Not my type.”

Dean raises an eyebrow.

“She’s trying too hard to be noticed. Everything about her screams _Look at me._ A true knockout lets it happen organically, her mere presence demands attention. When someone tries that hard, it’s usually because they’re putting on an act.” Lex looks over at Draco. “Feel free to make a run at her though. I relinquish all rights for having spotted her first.”

Draco laughs. “She’s not my type either, mate.”

“Oh?”

“Muggle.”

Lex opens his mouth to protest, but Draco cuts him off with a wave. “I’m not saying I wouldn’t give a Muggle a toss; but you’re right, she’s trying too hard. She’s looking for fresh meat, someone she doesn’t know to carry her away from this not-so-quaint little hamlet. I have no desire for there to be a price tag on our interaction, no matter how spectacular it might be.”

Apparently modified, Lex leans against the vinyl seat.

“So?” Draco looks over at Dean.

Dean blinks, a strange look passing over his face. Instead of answering, he openly watches the woman, who in turn is scanning the crowed with cool calculation, pointedly ignoring the pitying glances the bartender is sending her way.

“I like a motivated woman,” Dean finally says.

“Careful of her web, mate.”

“I’m not worried. After all, you guys have my back, right?”

Both Draco and Lex nod.

“Good, then meet me by the car and play along.”

As Dean walks toward the bar, Draco looks at Lex. “We’re going to regret this, aren’t we?”

Lex laughs. “That or it’s going to be one hell of a ride.”

They both take one last draw from their bottles, then head toward the door. Once outside, Draco pulls his wand and mutters something under his breath. Two cameras glow brightly in the darkness. He flicks his wrist twice in quick succession before putting his wand back in his sleeve.

Lex cocks an eyebrow at him.

“The cameras will show the parking lot devoid of people for the next twenty minutes.”

“Good thinking.”

“I’d be offended, but--”

“But?”

“But nothing, I’ve decided I’m offended after all.”

Laughing, Lex shoves him good-naturedly toward the car.

Three minutes later, Dean and the woman in red come stumbling out of the bar. Dean is doing a remarkable drunk impersonation, though both men know he only drank one beer. The woman is giggling as she tries to pull Dean’s face in close enough to kiss his lips. But every time it appears she might succeed, Dean stumbles again, throwing them both off balance.

When they finally arrive at the Impala, the woman notices Lex and Draco for the first time. Instead of looking scared, she looks…almost hungry.

She giggles. “What’s this?”

“It’s my car,” Dean slurs.

“And these two gentlemen?”

Lex and Draco both wave happily, trying to emulate the same level of drunkenness as Dean.

“My friends,” Dean explains. “We’re on a road trip.”

“Ah.”

“Boys, Amber is going to be joining us on the road.”

“The more the merrier.” Draco grins lopsidedly.

“How’s she paying?” Lex looks at Dean. “Cash, grass or ass?”

Dean gives him a sharp look, but Amber just laughs.

“How are you two paying?” she asks, her voice thick with innuendo.

“I’m cash, he’s grass.”

Draco shoots him a questioning glace but still nods inanely.

“I guess that makes me ass.” Amber practically purrs the words. “So who do I pay?”

Dean places her in the center of the triangle the three men have formed. “Close your eyes.” He whispers the words close to her ear and she complies, her breath coming in little gasps. Looking directly at Lex, Dean twirls his index finger in the air. Lex immediately reaches out and gently starts turning her.

“I want you to count to ten. Whoever is standing in front of you when you stop will receive payment,” Dean tells her.

Amber nods eagerly and starts turning on her own. When she reaches ten, she stops in front of Lex and smiles lasciviously as she opens her eyes. “I guess I pay you.”

“I guess you do,” Lex says in his most seductive voice.

Dean clasps her bare shoulders, his blade palmed in his hand. Her skin starts to bubble the moment the silver touches her skin. Amber starts to shriek; however, Draco steps forward and covers her mouth with his hand. Dean moves his palm down her shoulders to verify his findings and to make sure the others see the results as well.

“What is she?” Draco asks.

“My guess is a succubus.”

“Do we kill her?”

Dean doesn’t answer, he simply slides the knife through her back and into her heart.

“I hate when they look human,” Draco says quietly.

“How’d you know?” Lex asks.

“A beautiful woman like her? Sooner or later someone would’ve granted her _wish_ , even if meant only taking her to the next town. Couple that with the pitying looks the bartender was giving her, like he knew she was going to fail. Again. What better way to feed than on strangers passing through? Men no one ever expects to see again.

“And if she’d just been a horny human, then what?”

“Then we might’ve had to perform an airtight.”

Draco frowns at his laughing friends. “Do I even want to know?”


End file.
